August 22, 2014 11:33 AM

Stanford: The resurrection of Rick Perry

From the left: Is there resurrection after indictments?

Not since Superman has a fella made such a big impression when he took off his eyeglasses. Turns out, the sexy new specs were a disguise all along. This is the Rick Perry we thought we were getting in 2012 when we left him for dead. But he’s back, baby, and if he can keep it up he just might be change Republicans can believe in.

We should have known better. The doddering fool who made goo-goo faces at maple syrup in New Hampshire and who couldn’t count to three in Iowa was not the bully who accused both Tony Sanchez and Bill White of complicity in the murders of law enforcement officers. Watching Perry get whipsawed by the children of a lesser God was like seeing your abusive stepfather get laid out by a dad in Dockers at a PTA meeting. After “oops,” we thought maybe the old guy had lost it. If he had not been wearing special orthopedics instead of his usual boots we would not have believed he knew how to tie his shoes.

So we indulged his attempt at redemption, told him he looked cool in his new black-rimmed eyewear even though he kiiiinda looked like a guy who was a little too old to be rolling up to the club, bless his heart. He traveled the country, staying out of our way as we focused on the campaign to replace him. Perry’s feeble war of words with California Gov. Jerry Brown seemed more like an audition for ***HBO’s VEEP* than a prelude to an actual run for the presidency. It all felt like a long goodbye.
The rest of Jason Stanford's column can be found in today's *R&D Department.***

By Jason Stanford